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Where do you keep finding these @russ 🤣

@deej

Where do you keep finding these @russ

In a vintage joke book for guitarists 😉

GUITAR JOKES

1. Q. What is the difference between a savings bond and a guitarist?
   A. Eventually a savings bond will mature and earn money.
2. Q. What do you call a guitar that never finishes a job?
   A. a quitar.
3. Q. How many guitarists does it take to play Stairway to Heaven?
   A. Apparently all of them.
4. Q: What does a guitarist say when he gets to his gig?
   A: Would you like fries with that?
5. Q. How do you get a guitarist to stop playing?
   A. Put sheet music in front of them.
6. Q. What is the difference between a rock guitarist, and a jazz guitarist?
   A. One plays three chords in front of thousands of people, the other plays thousands of chords in front of three people.
7. Q. Why are so many guitar player jokes one liners?
   A. So the rest of the band can understand them.
8. Q: What do you call a female police officer who plays guitar?
   A: SHE RIFF
9. Q. What’s God’s favourite chord?
   A. Gsus.
10. Q. How does a guitarist greet another guitarist?
    A. “I’m better than you”
11. Q. How long does it take to tune a 12-string guitar?
    A. Nobody knows.
12. Q. What do a cup of coffee and Eric Clapton have in common?
    A. They both suck without Cream.
13. Q. What do you call a guitar player without a girlfriend?
    A. Homeless.
14. Q. What’s the difference between a guitar player and a bag of garbage?
    A. The garbage gets taken out at least once a week.
15. Q. How do you get a million dollars?
    A. Start off with 2 million and try to make a living playing the guitar.

Q. How do you get a guitarist to stop playing?
A. Put sheet music in front of them.

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Posted by: @

Good Old Faithful Google Deej.

Cheers,

Russ

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🎶🙏🎸🙂

Good Old Faithful Google Deej

😉

Just keeping the thread going @russ ....

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That last one (@russ) reminds me of a true story ...

Back in the day when I was a living-at-home-teenager with a guitar, an amp and my bedroom ... my mother was talking to our neighbour and said something like "I hope his guitar playing doesn't disturb you too much".

Neighbour replied;

"Oh no, not at all.  We can only hear him if we're out in the garden.  Or in the kitchen.  Or the dining room.  Or the lounge ...."

At the time, I think I had my Carlsbro Stingray.  2x12" 100w combo.  

And it wasn't even a big bedroom!

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